The Baldy-heidit Maister When I was at primary school, there was a little song going round, sung approximately to the tune of My Old Man’s a Dustman . The lyric was: Oor wee schule’s a guid wee schule, It’s made o’ brick and plaister. The only thing that’s wrang wi’ it Is the baldy-heidit maister. He goes to the pub on a Saturday night, He goes to the kirk on Sunday. He prays to the Lord to gie him strength Tae murder the bairns on Monday. I remember one of my pals, James Barker, singing this at a school Christmas party. It caused much hilarity, and was considered audacious in view of the fact that our headmaster at the time, Mister Bryce, who was presiding over the celebrations, was bald. He took it all in good part. More of Mister Bryce and his benign nature later. ...